Best blogger in the world result delayed

Although we feel like negative campaigning should be completely ignored, it has come to our attention that some bloggers are completely boring and not ready to accept the magnitude of an award such as this. This is unfortunate, but a reality in this world. With that in mind, we’re going to try to do a detailed background check on each of the finalists to ensure that they’re mentally ready to be thrust into the world spotlight. This check will be three fold:

- 1 – Education level and qualification
Any blogger that is vying for the best blogger in the world prize will need to have at least spent two weeks inside a school. This can be anything from primary to College, but we need to be sure that they have at least learned to tie their shoe laces. This will ensure that when they receive their trophy on the big stage they won’t fall over.

- 2 – Visitor intellect
We will run each blog post and comment on their website through a checker which will automatically calculate the IQ and EQ of each contributor. This will also ensure that there is no mental sludge seeping into the award ceremony and that the people who are asked to come and sip champagne and eat caviar with us are not going to start throwing it around the room.

- 3 – Visual inspection
As with many online tests, it’s always possible to cheat, either via using online tools to look up the answers or by having someone else take the test on your behalf. I know it’s practically unbelievable that someone would want to cheat us – the most honest awards group in the history of the world – but it is true. How do we stop this? By doing a visual inspection of each candidate – and if anyone is found to be even a little bit ugly or goofy, they will be removed from the longlist and sent packing out of the blogosphere’s most powerful and influential awards program!

There’s our criteria – thanks for reading. I appreciate that everyone in the world is dying to know who is the best blogger in the world, and we will make our announcement soon!

The criteria, once again, were extremely strict, but it seems that even the big guns in the Internet world (the Yahoos, Googles and About.com’s) can not compete with the likes of the little guy. The world wide web is run by people who are not working for monster organizations, but those who work and toil every day to bring info to the real world.

Who is the best blogger in the world?

That’s right folks, we can now at least formally announce that the winner of the best blogger in the world prize is not someone from a fortune 500 company or some organization with billions of dollars propping up its useless yapping mouthpieces. The winner is a true visionary, someone who is bringing information and knowledge to the masses and spinning it with a variety and comedy that is rarely seen among the normal people in society.

We can not reveal at this precise time the winner of the award for legal reasons, but soon we will announce who is the best blogger in the world, so stay tuned to this site and subscribe to our RSS feed for more information as it breaks!

From an initial long-list of around 54,000 websites we were able to run them through a brand new algorithm (which is patented and trademarked and copyrighted) which removed almost all of them based on the criteria which we outlined in our earlier archived posts. It’s not an easy task (in fact the computer which hosts this complex sequence has been working almost non-stop for the last 35 days).

After deleting half of the list we moved down to checking by hand some of the submissions which came in using automated software. We decided that if someone uses automation to apply for the award of Best Blogger in the World we should not just delete them automatically, as it is possible that in their job as a writer they are too busy to perform all correspondence by hand, however we don’t just want rubbish.

Finally we were left with a list of 2,000 of the world’s top bloggers. We then slowly checked every post they’ve ever written for signs of inaccuracy or mistakes.

Finally, we were left with one name.

So this is certain – the subject matter of the blog must be something pertaining to the normal lives or social lives of everyday people. When defining everyday people, it’s important not to become snobby or judgemental. We’re not talking about income or lifestyle, but something which people would objectively call ‘normal’. Once we’ve got that settled, let’s move on to some examples of content which would be suitable for a placing in the awards ceremony.

Subject matter – What does the world’s best blogger blog about?

Firstly, we should think about things which affect people in their daily lives. Food, sports, entertainent – these are items which we could easily count as applicable to the award. All of these topics would also be handled in a way that people could relate to them and can understand them, even if they’re extremely confusing and weird. There’s nothing worse than having to read through pages of jargon in order to try to find the information that you’re looking for. A blogger should keep it real, factual and simple. What’s more, a combination of these factors would surely be necessary for the winner of the prize – The best blogger in the world!

To begin with, we’re going to need to look at the criteria for the award of the most amazing blog writer on the planet. It can’t be taken lightly, because this is an industry which will soon be more important than selling precious metals and oil (it probably already is more important than those).

Blogging is a lifestyle for many, and the things that bloggers write in their websites are copied and reproduced all over the world again and again. We wanted to harness the power of the internet to show you who the #1 blogger on earth is, and why they are the best. It should not take too long.

Later we will talk about the criteria that we need to find who is the best blogger in the world, but some of the basics should probably be underlined right now. First, a blogger should always be relevant. They should be accesible to the greatest number of people possible, and the items that they write about should be fun and interesting. There’s no room for boring people in the best blogger competition. They should work without the need for recognition – but for the enjoyment of spreading news. When was the last time you heard of someone like that? Exactly.

For now, please stick around on the website and check out more information about the most prestigious and fun award in the history of the internet – the best blogger in the world.